Just a thought

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Been going back and forth in a relationship for a while now only to realize, I’ve been doing it wrong. I’ve been thinking that I can make it work by doing things, answering every call, listening to every word etc. etc. But I overlooked one crucial thing. Sharing. “Why sharing?” You may ask. Well, being in a relationship I had to share time, my money, my heart, my mind and just about everything i could think of. But I neglected one thing. I had to share the responsibility. I had to share the responsibility of being in a relationship. WE had to share the responsibility. We had to meet each other half way and sometimes carry each other over the ditches. Hope this could be of use to you. Don’t take it all upon yourself, you’re not in it alone. If you are, then you’re better off single. 😉

Arguing 101

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READ AT OWN RISK!!!!!!!

There are three steps in arguing:
1. Start
2. Prolong
3. End

The first step is the easiest.to start an argument with a lady or woman for that matter, the best way is to insult her. eg. “AY! YO! YO MOBY!! MOBY DICK!!!”(for the less experienced agrument starters). If she is actually fat u do the opposite but u do it sarcastically “wooooooowww u look soooooooo slim.”
This will cause her to snap. She is going to be on you like stink on a skunk. Now, if she walks away from all that, the sure way to get her started is to remind her of her own dark secret (provided that you know…if not.. make it up) eg “YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY WHEN WERE 12!!!” (you can now add an insult) “YOU WENCH!!!! Now if u do not know how to prolong the argument after she calls you a bitch, gay or Asian then you r in deep doodoo and if she is gangster (in which case you shouldn’t have messed with in the 1st place) be prepared to run.

The second step is the hardest which is prolonging.To prolong an argument u have to be quick but slow. this means that u have to have a pre-formulated list of comebacks but you don’t let them out too fast lest you catch her off guard and she wont have anything to say(which happens kinda rarely)thus ending the argument.So, eg she says “MOBY DICK TO YOUR MOMS!!!!” u have to wait for at least 3 seconds and then reply ” YOUR BOOBS SAG MORE THAN WEEZY’S JEANS!” then she would probably say ” like your nut sack!” then u wait the 3 seconds and then reply “the one you were acquainted with lastnight!!”……etc etc you get the point. So, remember, fast to think calculative to reply.

The Ending is a bit tricky, but once you’ve done it once it’ll stick. To successfully end an argument you have to randomly shout out something. For example, she says “you have a small —–!”, you reply ” the sun is filled with gas!!!”-but be aware that you don’t stick around after you say this- after you’ve shouted out the random phrase, you then walk away. Staying within the danger zone will give rise to a possible comeback.

I wrote this note to benefit all those persons in relationships out there. Because after a heated argument the make up is sweeeet!!!!(unless one of you dies)

Happy Argument.